Dr Nahid Dave, psychiatrist , explains, “As human beings, we change and evolve every few years, and our perception of ourselves and the wider world changes as well. Healthy relationships involve learning to accommodate these changes, and communicating regularly to work through rough patches. If either partner is unwilling to work towards finding common ground, the relationship may not be worth holding on to.”
Read between the lines
How satisfied you are with your relationship depends on your personality, coping skills and expectations from the relationship, says Dr Nahid Dave.
Before you decide whether or not to work on your relationship, she recommends you do the following:
♦ Know if the decision is yours alone, or if it influenced by someone else, including your friends and family
♦ Understand if your dissatisfaction is rooted in comparisons with other people and their relationships
♦ Determine what is keeping you in the relationship and measure this against what you stand to gain by walking away. Here, drawing up a list can help.
♦ Make sure you aren’t holding on to a toxic relationship because you are afraid of uncertainty, or societal and familial considerations. If necessary, seek support
♦ While certain combinations of personality types are not compatible in theory, reality can and often is different. Know how much you are willing to compromise and also if you are the only one being called on to make sacrifices
“Although it is possible to still work on your relationship after either partner has cheated, this is only the case when true remorse is expressed. If your partner repeatedly cheats on you, or if you find it very difficult to get over your partner’s infidelity, you’re probably better off not being together,” says Dr Dave.
Quoted in Mumbai mirror and Pune Mirror
Dr Nahid Dave